Experience optional

Since posting my résumé on Monster, I have received inquiries from two recruiters that genuinely interested me; a few wildly poetic, almost free-associative letters from wealthy African widows; and about 10 messages from insurance companies. The latest (this just in... the next-to-latest; another arrived as I was typing the previous sentence) says in part, "No experience is needed as we offer an extensive training program, benefits and transition pay to help you get started in your career. I believe you may have some of the needed skills to be successful with our firm."

I, too, believe I may, but I would rather take my chances with my tantalizing new Ghanaian friend Naomie. All I have to do is adopt her 8-year-old, and she'll send me 15% of her late husband's $13.8 million fortune. If my math is correct, that's $2,010,000 more than I'm supposed to be able to make in my first, wildly successful year as a Financial Planner. (Or is the job title, as the second paragraph of the same e-mail has it, Financial Advisor? HR -- if this company had HR -- would be most displeased with the discrepancy.)

I can forgive Naomie's absurd writing ("All I need now is for you to Investor this Fund for my only son"); indeed, I relish it. Our world would be a poorer place, though Lagos might be a richer city, if the Nigerian scammers finally hired a copy editor. (Question for further research: can a copy editor be held civilly or criminally liable if the message s/he cleans up is used in the execution of a financial fraud?)

From insurers in Denver, I expect slightly better writing. Friends, can we come together as a society and agree once and for all that interest can be piqued, not peaked? More importantly, I'm concerned by the constant emphasis on experience not being required. I worked hard for my experience, and while I may sometimes question its marketability, I'm nowhere near being ready to abandon it. For the most part, my experience has been -- well, a good experience.

I'm not against insurance. I'm the satisfied owner of several insurance policies (which reminds me, I must dig out those policy numbers for Naomie...). I just question the wisdom of positioning an industry as a human dumping ground.