My next interview

At my most recent job interview they asked me what my weaknesses are and LIKE AN IDIOT, I told them. Everything the outplacement firm tried to teach me about rehearsing for these softball questions flew out of my head and was replaced with the last thing anybody wants to hear in an interview: sincerity.

Here's how I intend things to go next time I am hit with the scripted questions we have all heard and should all be able to answer in our sleep:

Them: Tell us about yourself.

Me: I'm extremely good at what I do. I'm communicative, collaborative and efficient.

Them: What are your strengths?

Me: I'm extremely good at what I do. I'm communicative, collaborative and efficient.

Them: We have half an hour. Would you like to add something?

Me: I could, but I'd merely be restating what I've already said. I respect my colleagues' and clients' time too much to waste it, which is why I mentioned that efficiency is one of my strengths.

Them: What are your weaknesses?

Me: I regret that I never mastered the French language.

Them: There must be something else.

Me: Well... if you must know... sometimes I have trouble deciding when to use "that" and when to use "which" as a pronoun.

Them: Thank you for coming in. Do you have any questions for us?

Me: Yes. Would you all please tell me your weaknesses now? We have nearly half an hour.